Monday, January 25

People are crazy

As if you didn't know already, people are crazy. If you didn't believe in God, then the idea of our pure existence would be baffling. Seriously, we are all crazy in some way. Every person shows a spurt of craziness, I say everyday, but maybe that's just me. I will go even further and say I bet you know a few of your friends, neighbors, co-workers, "acquaintances", wives, husbands who could be considered "certifiable". "I ain't no doctor, but _____________ is certifiable. Yep, sure is, an institution is where she needs to be". Ladies, don't have a hissy-fit on me because I said SHE. You have to be honest, women are crazier than men. And ladies, before you start thinking I am a sexist pig, think about all the crazy shit you, your girlfriends, and other females you know do and you how you thought to yourself "That bitch is crazy". Okay then. Now that I got you off my back I can say men are also crazy. Which proves my point that all people are crazy.

Why am I talking about the crazies. A perfect example would be the dude I ran into tonight walking to meet Lo for dinner. Outside our house on the corner is where two streets meet (hence a corner). There are pedestrian markings across the street to show that "Pedestrians have the right away". I say that lightly because in D.C. that is not the case. Anywho, the normal looking dude starts crossing the street just as the traffic begins to move. Like any day post work in D.C., the cars continue on their way, not letting the guy cross. He goes ape shit. Like crazy screaming "PEDESTRIANS HAVE THE RIGHT AWAY ASSHOLES, LET ME CROSS!!!" This goes on a bit because the cars have yet to let him continue on his way. Finally, he is able to start walking and he finished crossing the street. He makes it to the sidewalk and continues on for another 15-20 feet and then stops and turns around, noticing that other people are now waiting on the cars to cross. The guy loses it in a matter that a straight jacket would not have stopped him. He starts jumping up and down, screaming, fist pumping, the whole nine yards. Remember: He is not on the side of the road, but 20 feet way...No car can see him. Then he just stopped, shrugged his shoulders, and began his journey again, as if it was a normal occurrence. Crazy.

My next example is our crazy neighbor AB (in case she stalks us, which might actually happen, I will not disclose her real name). See AB is a crazy lady. One evening around 6:30 (5:30 for all you Central folk), Lo and I decided we needed to clean up our apartment. It was post Christmas and we had yet to put the luggage, presents, etc away since our return. So as anyone would do to get into the cleaning spirit, we turned on some tunes on our i Home and popped open a bottle of red to ease the pain. Twenty minutes into our cleaning, our very intense cleaning..HAHA, we get a knock on our door.... See we live on the top floor of the building, the only apartment at the top, making it very rare for anyone to come up, especially since you can not just walk into the building; you must be buzzed in. Anyways, I open the door and there stands AB's husband. See AB was pissed because the people "up top" were "having a dance party". Okay Okay, we did do a couple of dance numbers, but not enough to think we were having a party. AB's huzzie looked shocked that there were only two people in our apt, to which he started back tracking apologizing for his wife's craziness. "She gets this way sometimes". Ummm... no kidding. Second go round with AB also occurred post Christmas. We ran into her outside, to where she said "I see youz guys are back in town. I was wondering if you were going to pick up all the Christmas Cards you got". Umm....stalking our mail are we? Crazy.

I could go on and on for days, but I think I will let the readers add to the story. So readers, let Lo and I hear about your crazy people encounters...of course...anonymous...I'm shooting that 2 maybe 3 people post, but come on guys, I write so you can have an enjoyable experience. Why not give back?


mother teresa said...

That's so funny. I'm shocked you even knew who Billy Currington was.

jordan r said...

Oh my goodness...that IS crazy that Billy Currington lives below you! I thought he was a country boy...